breaks, trips, work, sun, and trash

today was one of the best days i have had yet this year. it was wonderful, and painful, enlightening and sorrowful! but i loved it, and i am actually looking forward to school, i know its weird, considering break wasnt that great, and i wish it could stay break forever, i guess thats why i am ready for school to get the next 10 weeks over and never have to be in high school again. its one of my favorite times of year, i am a sun and flowers kind of child, i think that is why i am bright and energetic. I went to church today and it was good, i went to bible study and that was better than church, and i went to work only to leave 10 mins later, and grocery shopping[i love the grocery store ;)] and i cleaned my room and remade my bed. my bed is work of magic! I went for about an hour walk with morgan and it was like medicine for my soul we talked about our normal walk things and it was incredible, she can understand things about me that barely anyone else can, and it helps clear both of our heads. it helps us feel closer when we go in opposite directions a lot. I decided im letting go of a bunch of stop, and im going to stop worrying and trying to change myself, and hating myself for my inability to change, im obviously this way for a reason, so im going to live with it for now. So its time for figuring out my summer plans, and im not going to camp, im staying home and going to do way fun things here, like camping and the beach, and hiking, and a whole bunch of other things, i should make a list. My family is going camping for memorial day weekend, by my family i mean, morgan, tab, david plantation, mom, dave, dan, matt, yana, and kenny, and whoever else. oh something interesting i notived while i was visiting my dad, to him blood family is everything, but he isnt that close to his family besides his immediate family, and with me i have alot of people who are my family but arent blood that i would do sometimes do more for than my actual family, i thought that was kinda crazy, So my visit to my grandma's to see bryan last monday broke my heart, and i still dont think im recovered, i think that part of me will always be broken. I miss tabatha, and david plantation. im feeling a bit all over the place and i think i like it. i walked into a door today and it was at bible study and bev was the only one who noticed and laughed at me alot, its a regular occurance. and i decided im like a scarecrow because i have no balance.......oh well, or maybe im just clumsy too


i have to find my summer soundtrack.......
right now i have
road to joy-bright eyes
permanent- david cook
the way i loved you